I’ve been a marriage and family counselor and therapist for more than 40 years and one of the most common concerns I hear from women is this: “Where are all the good men? I’m a quality woman who has a lot of offer a partner, but I can’t seem to find my soul mate.” I...Continue reading
When do we hit our peak? Well that depends on how you define peak. Peak muscular strength in men occurs around age 26. In terms of smarts, Nobel Prize winners make their big discoveries at an average age of 40 years. And, as you might already know, men peak emotionally even later, at 50 years. But do...Continue reading
In last week’s column, we talked about what to do when, despite your best efforts, your relationship with your partner is about to end. Strategies we discussed included getting legal advice, considering alternatives to litigation, and understanding that there’s no such thing as “winning” custody. This week I want to share a few more strategies...Continue reading
Dear Mr. Dad: You often write about how couples can improve their communication and how that communication can protect their relationship. But what about after the relationship ends, which is what’s happening with my girlfriend and me? A: It may sound strange, but communication during and after a divorce or breakup is still critical. First, maintaining...Continue reading
Chronic and excessive anger causes the following problems: Increases a man’s risk for high blood pressure and heart-disease. Stresses relationships and causes women to withdraw. Is related to male-type depression. Creates separation between men, women, and children. Is linked to both high levels of testosterone and low levels. Is being played out on a national...Continue reading
I’ve written a lot about male anger including two books, The Irritable Male Syndrome and Mr. Mean: Saving Your Relationship From the Irritable Male Syndrome and a recent article, “Are You Living With an Angry Man?” I recently received an email from Ann Silvers, author of Abuse OF Men BY Women: It Happens, it Hurts, and It’s Time to Get Real About...Continue reading
Consider this scenario: A couple gets into a fight, the woman hits the man with a frying pan and the man forcefully pushes her away. If the police are called, it is almost always the man [YR1] who is charged and hauled away. The recent case of actress Asia Argento, who allegedly forced a 17-year-old boy...Continue reading
I’ve been a psychotherapist for fifty years now and I’ve seen a lot of angry men and counseled thousands of women who live with angry men. I’ve also helped many more relationships recover when they’ve been on the brink of ending. I’ve found that there is one problem that causes more damage than any other,...Continue reading
There is nothing more satisfying than finding the love of your life and nothing more painful than finding your loved one has cheated on you. This year I’ll celebrate 50 years working to help men and women live joyful, passionate, lives. Since receiving my graduate degree from U.C. Berkeley in 1968, I have counseled more...Continue reading
Angry white male voters. Men’s boorish—if not criminal—behavior highlighted by the #MeToo movement. The backlash after the Kavanaugh hearings. These have provoked much talk about “male rage,” as if it is a single definable phenomenon concentrated among working-class white Trump supporters. This is simplistic and wrong. And it makes it more difficult to address the...Continue reading