When asking myself the lessons a father must teach their son, I had to break this down into two groups. There are both primary lessons and indirect or secondary lessons that fathers must teach their children.
The primary lessons I feel are the most important and the secondary ones are what fathers can teach children in any way in that it does not exactly have to be the father doing the teaching. In other words, although the son can learn these from the father, by-and-large the son can teach himself or learn these from others.
Primary lessons to teach kids include Independence, Gratitude, Respect, Perseverance, Hope, and Family
Secondary/Indirect: Celebrations (laughter, comedy, fun), Teamwork, and Achieving your goals and dreams and pursuing your passion
Independence
As highly valued as a son embarks into adulthood, this is the number one goal of becoming a man. When someone learns the value of independence, the rest of life is a fairly paved road. You cannot have value of anything in life until you truly become independent. I still have to learn this and I am 27 years old, however, I have had an extremely fortunate upbringing that is unique to me.
My father was raised fatherless at the age of around 10. He was raised predominately so by my grandmother. Much of what he learned of anything in life was to be independent. He moved from another country after college, not knowing anything of the world that lay before him. Not only did he succeed in his journey as a father, he has been a truly inspiring role model to say the least. He owns a business, he raised 3 boys, and he still has heart leftover to help anyone that needs it including all of his living relatives and close friends overseas. A man, truly.
Gratitude
One needs to learn so that he could be thankful for the things he values. When one values something, there is a never-ending supply of energy that comes from this. It’s when we value things, that we can interact with other people in society and do things that are productive and constructive, and the essence of survival and living to old age depends on our values. I like to think of our values as medicine. We can trade it, we can use it to get better, or we can give it to somebody else who needs it. There is no magic bullet that can cure all…however, it is with our resources that we can use it for whatever we wish that uniquely carves our path in life.
Respect
If we wish to learn from anyone as men, we need to learn to respect men. This is the tool of “knowledge” that we eat which gives one the ability to progress.
Perseverance
Much of what we can achieve in life is based upon how long we are willing to struggle and fight for.
Hope
For the times when something more is needed, the feeling that hope can give us is enough to push men to achieve their path in life, which is unique to men.
Family– This could be considered a separate lesson because it has so much to say about it. By and large the ability to have a family and raise it accordingly is the ultimate success of fatherhood.
Secondary lessons
Celebrations include partying, having fun, laughter, etc. It is what we do as men. Whenever we achieve something, we CELEBRATE! We need to measure our goals, and we need to keep track of how things are going. To break the monotony of the endless amount of goals we have, we mark the end of each of them with a celebration. Whether its a high-five, or a butt slap!
Teamwork
Not everything can be accomplished alone. The power of teamwork comes into play to get large projects accomplished.
Achieving your goals – What else is life about, if we do not have goals?
