It’s said that we teach what we want to learn and I’ve been teaching and learning about men’s anger and how it impacts our relationships for many years now. 2018 marks 50 years that I’ve been in the business of helping men (My wife thinks I should say, 40 plus years, because 50 years might...Continue reading
Manhood today is maligned and misunderstood. Some believe maleness itself is inherently destructive and should be eliminated. In his book, The End of Manhood, John Stoltenberg says that the notion of manhood “is a sham, a trap, and those who would redeem it are kidding themselves, for manhood is a mask, incompatible with truly human selfhood.” Others...Continue reading
The often-justifiable anger of women toward men has left boys in the lurch. In one of my earliest posts on Psychology Today, back in March 2010, I wrote of how stuck I felt being a liberal who cared about boys (and young men). While the data clearly showed that boys were struggling in school, and in other...Continue reading
Chronic and excessive anger causes the following problems: Increases a man’s risk for high blood pressure and heart-disease. Stresses relationships and causes women to withdraw. Is related to male-type depression. Creates separation between men, women, and children. Is linked to both high levels of testosterone and low levels. Is being played out on a national...Continue reading
Dear Mr. Dad: I’m a new dad and have been reading to my baby. But I’ve started to notice that most of the parents in children’s books are moms. There are some books where dad is the main parent, but most of the time we’re not there at all. My wife says that the media...Continue reading
You’ve probably experienced an ache or two at some point in your life. Toothache. Backache. Shoulder pain. Ankle sprain. Pain is part of the human predicament. Like pimples, aches and pains come and go. But what happens when suddenly something pops up down there?
It’s difficult not to feel stressed and depressed when we reflect on the state of our world. Our political world is in disarray and extreme climate is seen throughout the country. Fires continue to burn throughout California. Here in Willits where I live we breathe the smoke every day from The Ranch Fire near Ukiah...Continue reading
The #MeToo movement has drawn attention to much horrific male behavior and deservedly has received much coverage. The Kavanaugh hearings also brought forth a torrent of discussion of what is sometimes called toxic masculinity. Headlines and social media posts about sexism, sexual assault, and men’s general piggishness abound. The harmful effects of misogyny, male boorishness...Continue reading
Consider this scenario: A couple gets into a fight, the woman hits the man with a frying pan and the man forcefully pushes her away. If the police are called, it is almost always the man [YR1] who is charged and hauled away. The recent case of actress Asia Argento, who allegedly forced a 17-year-old boy...Continue reading
Part 1: Fortitude I’ve been interested in maleness for as long as I can remember. When I was three years old, my mother took me to the shoe store to get my first pair of “little boy” shoes. I was entranced with the red Keds, until the salesmen explained that “You really want the blue ones. Blue...Continue reading