Dear Mr. Dad: My wife and I have a son, and since we both come from large families, we were looking forward to creating one of our own. But there are two problems. First, we were hit hard by the recent recession, and have yet to recover. As a result, we don’t feel right having children that we can’t afford. Second, because our financial problems have lasted so long, we’re both in our early 40s now. So two questions: Are we too old to have another child? If so, should we have one anyway to keep our son from growing up alone?
A: You’re definitely not too old. Lots of people have kids later in life, so you can take age off the table. The money issue is a little tougher. The economy is supposedly on the rebound, but we’ve been hearing that for a few years and there are still millions of unemployed or underemployed people out there. If you’re having trouble making ends meet now, setting another plate at the dinner table isn’t going to make life any easier. And the associated financial stress could strain your marriage and make it hard for you and your wife to be the kind of parents you want to be. That said, plenty of children grow up in less-than-rich families and do just fine.
As to your other question, if you’re considering bringing another baby into the world simply so your son won’t be an only child, don’t make a final decision just yet. To start with, your son won’t actually be alone. Your family situation (age + financial constraints) is far from unique and has led to an increase in the number of only children.
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